"city of stars and dreams, come see me
take my withering soul out of the abyss and drench my thirst
love my weary earthly body with thy warmth and beauty
come fill this restless mind with thy bouts of intellect and wit
clean this soul with thy holiness and sanctitude"
i lie on the kitchen floor withered as i look on hopelessly
searching and searching
staking myself in the heart like the undead
living but not alive
i ground my sadness and filth onto the city of stars and dreams
i lay on the maggot filled bed,
unable to sleep
the remains of my parents putrid and stinging to the senses
i slap, scratch and sock
so i could be able to rest, for once.
i filled my dreams with creatures who horrify and unsettle
but finding myself a home in their loneliness
their sharp teeth filled with blood, bile and filth
their stench and reeking scent
i find myself belonging to them more than i ever did here.
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